Grihastashrama( Married Life)---- 1976 to 1978

My first day in Madras as the head of a household was a bit of a disaster.

As I've mentioned earlier, my dad and mom and Sethuram and Seetha accompanied us to Madras.

We were staying in Annanagar West which was just on the edge of civilization.My scooter was the only mode of conveyance.To top it all, Sudha didn't know a word of Tamil.

We didn't have a gas connection and we didn't have a sofa set or dining table.A fridge was out of the question.

The first thing we did was to hire a small girl ( maybe around 10 years) as a servant maid.We called her Ponnu.

Next was to register with Aavin for daily milk supply.

As soon as we landed in Madras, I went out and made a phone call to Venu to tell him that we had come.Somewhere during the conversation, I invited Venu over with his family for dinner that night and Venu promptly accepted. This was around 1 PM. I came back and told Sudha and my mom that Venu and his family were coming home that evening for dinner.

They looked at me in horror and gave me a look that indicated that I must have gone out of my mind.After she recovered her wits, my mom asked me whether I knew that we didn't have enough plates and glasses, we didn't have chairs to seat any guests, we didn't have a dining table to dine on, we didn't have any milk and curds, we didn't have enough dishes to cook a decent meal and we didn't have enough vegetables etc etc etc.She also reminded me that all cooking was to be done on a single electric stove since we didn't have cooking gas.

After having delivered that royal firing, mom, Sudha and Seetha got down to prepare something. I'm sure their simmering anger against me helped speed up the cooking.

I went crazy with fetching things from the Chintamani Supermarket on my scooter for the dinner.

After this notable event, things settled down somewhat and we made a few trips in 7C Bus Route to Parry's Corner and Evening Bazaar to get some essential household stuff.

We also made a bus trip to Adyar Gate to visit Venu's house.It was a long bus ride and all of us , barring Sudha, went off to sleep. She didn't know where we should get off and was hesitant to wake us up. Anyway, I woke up in time and we had no mishaps.

My parents-in-law visted us and gifted a dining table set.
My company managing director gave me a gift of Rs.1000 and we bought a sofa set with this money.

We were staying in a portion of a house which had two other tenants, both of them sisters.They were Sindhis and Sudha felt very comfortable talking to them in Hindi

I used to be off to work by 8.30 AM and returned in the evening.Sudha took stenography and typing classes to while away her time.Her teacher was a retired Legislative Assembly Stenographer and his wife was a typical Madras Maami who would give Sudha Arashina + Kunkuma on festival days etc.

In the evenings, Sudha and I would go out shopping and buy things to furnish our house.Grocery and provision purchase was at the nearby Chinthamani Supermarket where I would stand in one queue to buy Kerosene and Sudha would stand in another queue to buy Aavin Butter or some such scarce commodity.

I had applied to the Park Town Co-Operative Society for an Indane Gas Connection but it normally took 3 years to get a connection. I had a friend in Indian Oil who helped me get an out of turn connection in May 1976.

In the same month, Rajani, Nandini,Anil and Badri came to spend a couple of days with us.We had no extra cots and all of us would sleep in the drawing room.We had good fun.

I had gone on a tour of Andhra during May and I visited places such as Sirpur Kaghaznagar and Bellampally where the weather was extremely hot. I caught a fever in Sirpur but decided to continue with my visit to Bellampally and then return to Chennai. This was my first to Bellampally where coal was being mined.I reached there with a high fever around 8 PM and checked into a dingy hotel.The air was thick with coal dust.There was no decent food available and I had to manage with Fanta Orange.

The next morning, the sun was bright and shining by 5.30 AM and it was already hot.I went to the Office of Singareni Collieries and the person there was shocked at seeing me. He asked me whether I had been asked to come. I said no, I came on my own.He told me never to come unless I was called and also said that, in that case, the company would make arrangements for transport and stay in their guest house.

I finished my work by 10 AM and scooted out of the place.

In June 1976, I went on a tour of Trichy, Madurai and Tuticorin and took Sudha along with me. We went to the Rock Fort Temple in Trichy, Srirangam, Madurai Meenakshi Temple and also to Kanyakumari.In Sriangam, I paid Rs.12 and bought a colourful saree for Sudha.

In August 1976, I went on a tour of Southern Tamil Nadu and almost got married a second time. Here's how it happened.

I had gone to visit a company called Kothari Phytochemicals which was on the outskirts of Madurai. I had gone there by a mofussil bus.After I finished my work, I came out and was waiting at a bus stop for a bus.I had a newspaper with me and was busy reading it.A few minutes later a woman in her twenties came and stood next to me.After some time, she asked me " Are you coming from Palani?"I did not want to enter into a conversation by saying yes or no, so I buried my face in the newspaper and gave a grunt.She took this as a yes and then asked " Are you going to Madurai?" Grunt.
"Weather is very hot , no?" Grunt.This went on for quite some time--- she asking questions and my replying with grunts with my face buried in the newspaper.

After some time, I realized the incogruity of the situation and thought I would get rid of her by walking up to a nearby teashop. She came behind me. I asked for a cup of tea and she said " One for me also". The shopkeeper looked at me and I nodded yes since it would be churlish to refuse a cup of tea to a lady.

The bus came and I got in and sat in the back seat.In Tamilnadu, the entire left side seats of any bus are usually reserved for women and a few seats were empty. Still the lady came and sat next to me.By now, alarm bells were ringing in my mind.

The conductor came around and I bought one ticket.The woman immediately said "One more ticket for me".The conductor looked questioningly at me and I shrugged my shoulders indicating I did not know who she was.Surprisingly, he did not ask the woman for any money but gave her a ticket anyway.

By now I was certain that something funny was going on.As the bus neared Madurai bus stand, I casually got up and edged my way towards the exit.The lady immediately got up and came behind me.

As the bus slowed down near the bus stand, I got off and ran to the nearest cycle rickshaw and told the driver to move.He asked me where to go.I told him to just start and get away.
The lady ran hard behind the cycle rickshaw and caught hold of a bar at the back and did not let go. I kept urging the driver to cycle faster but she did not let go.By now, we were going through the main street in Madurai and a crowd was looking on.In between gasps of breath, the lady kept shouting " Enne vittitu povadeengo"--- Don't leave me and go.

I asked the rickshaw driver to stop near a traffic policeman.
By now a big crowd had gathered. I went up to the policeman and told him that the lady had followed me all the way from the suburb.The policeman asked her why she was following me and she replied" En purushan saar. Enne vittitu poyitanga"--- " He is my husband.he has left me and gone".

I told the policeman that I was already married and from Madras and produced my visiting card. He took one look at it and asked me to get away as soon as possible.I got into the rickshaw again and told the driver to move fast. The lady broke away and again started running behind me but we had already covered some distance.I was staying at The New College House and decided to cut short my Madurai visit and proceed to Tuticorin. The problem was that I had to catch a bus and therefore would have to come to the bus stand again.

I changed my clothes, put on my sunglasses and very warily came to the bus stand.Fortunately, the woman was nowhere to be seen and I made a smooth getaway.

End of story.